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  • Writer's pictureRay Watters


Updated: Aug 26, 2022

I’ve heard all too often from fellow actors (and have experienced myself) that there are people in your life you have considered friends…until you became successful in your craft. These people changed from “friend” to the latest word du jour…“hater”…almost overnight. It happens. These people are what former HBO Casting Director, Amy Jo Berman (see link below) refers to as “Dream Stealers” or “Energy Vampires.” If this has happened to you, read on.

Many of us have worked hard through the years to train in our craft. We have worked free just to build our resume. We have spent considerable time and money in training. We understand rejection after having driven many miles to many auditions, only to hear nothing, except for that rare call back. In the beginning, our experience on a film set is one of the passing pedestrian on the street, or the diner in a restaurant. After some time, however, things start happening and we see some success and may eventually get that big break. While it may have been dumb luck for a very small number of actors, the majority of us realize the time and work it took to finally get those good roles. Most, but not all of your friends will applaud your success. Many do not realize that experienced actors have "paid their dues" as extras on film sets before becoming professional. I know I had to do that and, while no longer taking extra or non-paid roles, realize that was valuable experience.

Unfortunately, there will still be the dream stealers…the energy vampires who are jealous of your success. There will be people who will try to put you down and make you feel “less than.” These are the people who feel bad about themselves and the only way they can build themselves up is to put you down. You also may experience those who were once friends and have stopped communicating with you. You may want to consider that it is time to just walk away from these people. For me, walking away from the haters was the best thing I could do.

For the people who are truly happy for your success, treat them like gold! I have many of those people in my life!

We know what it took to get where we are.

Check out the link below.

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